An Open Letter to An Open-Minded Manager

{As some of you may or may not know, I have been working as a full-time temporary employee for the last 16 months (read: no vacation, no sick time, no employer-sponsored health or dental coverage, no contribution to a retirement plan, no security).  While I love what I do, passion is not enough to pay student loans and eat.

In the next few weeks, as the grant monies that fund my position slowly get spent away, I will be let go.  I have been searching and applying for new work with an increased fervor in the last month, but with little results.  It's a tough market out there, folks. 

I have not been offered a position or hired yet, but someday someone will call.  This is a letter to that someone who takes a chance and says "We would be delighted if you would join our team."}

Dear Hiring Manager,

Congratulations, today you have made an excellent decision for the progress of your organization! Today, you took a chance and you hired me.  And I promise to make that a decision you can be happy with for a very long time.

You recognized that my varied interests and experiences translate into a fresh and adaptable young employee. You saw that I can (and do!) become passionate about everything I do, and you have offered me an environment that encourages my creativity and gently guides my growth. As much as I tried to remain calm and graceful in the interview, my chattiness certainly overshadowed whatever poise I had intended to present to you. Thank you for recognizing that as a strength of a strong and open communicator who loves nothing more than to share information in a novel way, to give large and engaging presentations, to meet with colleagues or stakeholders and have honest and meaningful discussion.

I cannot express to you my excitement to join your team.  The road from graduate school to a professional career has been a bit tumultuous over the last couple of years. Turns out, the years that are "great to be a student" really stink to be a recent graduate... but I am excited to be released of the burden that uncertainty can cause so that I can really focus on my work.  I am excited to create quality work for this organization and develop tools and products that can be shared so that others may learn from what we do.  I am excited to learn from others; in the workplace, in the industry, in the community. I am excited to be a positive force in my workplace-- someone who thinks and speaks highly of others, someone who expresses gratitude to those around me, and someone who occasionally tells a lively and engaging story or two! I am excited that you and your organization have committed to me and my professional growth. I intend to commit to this organization and this work in the same way.

I am dedicated to this position and this organization.

I am motivated to create positive change in my community and that will be reflected in any work I do.

I am ready to face each challenge with a balance of professionalism, creativity, and enthusiasm that cannot be learned in any program-- it is unique to me.

I may never know what it was about my application or my interview that made you take a second look or made you say, "Let's give her a call." All I know is that on the first day that I enter the office, I am going to bring with me a passion and work ethic that makes you feel certain you have made the right choice.  And a plant; I am going to bring with me a plant.

Thank you, again, for the opportunity. 

Sincerely,

Katie

P.S. See you Monday!

Analytically Speaking

I would love to say I use Google Analytics to maximize my readers' experience of my blog. 

I don't.

I basically use it to spy on you.  Where do you live? What are you reading? How did you get here?

My favorite is to see what term people searched for to end up at my blog. Below are some of the stranger ones:

1. scientific law (Yes, the words written in this blog are scientific law. Or, they should be.)
2. what is fartlekking (The seventh circle of Hell.)
3. atheist cat (What.)
4. drugging your cat (I didn't really drug him. I hope this person finds the, uh, advice they were looking for...)
5. fartlekking (The seventh circle of Hell.)
6. girl panics on febreeze commercial (Well, a giant-ass fish swims through a living room. You would panic too)
7. mugwump cat (Ha! He needs his own blog. [Right now the Boyfriend is groaning and thinking "Oh my god, she's going to start a blog from her cat's perspective." No I'm not, because imagining Boyfriend thinking that was enough satisfaction!])
8. what's a fartlek (The seventh circle of Hell.)
9. "Every morning in Africa a gazelle wakes up.  It knows it must move faster than the lion or it will not survive.  Everyone morning in Africa a lion wakes up and knows it must be faster than the slowest gazelle or it will starve.  It does not matter if you are the lion or the gazelle. When the sun comes up, you better be moving." (Love this quote. And now love whomever searched for it. Love love love.)
10. turtleneck swimsuit (What?)
11. Bob Costas sauna (WHAT?! Gross.)
12. don't feed the grad students (no truer advice has ever been spoken)
13. "convention of international sale of goods" undersized shrimp (Ha! Reason #238 dating a lawyer brings me joy. Also, isn't the very nature of shrimp that they are 'undersized'?)
14. grad school makes you fat (Who are you calling fat, you big cow?!)
15. national escargot day (I am assuming this comes from an Obscure Holidays post...)
16. activate mugwump (Ha! Read this as "Activate: Mugwump!" and it just has a certain superhero je ne sais quoi about it. Love)
17. Bob Costas is a punk (that's more like it)
18. Border collie hypersensitve (Googler, you get it.)
19. Bubble bath wine (You definitely get it).
20. funny sentence with mugwump in it (Hmm, I don't think I have any of those.  But I have something better! A bunch of funny sentence written by a Mugwump! Right? Right?!)
21. modern battle pants (What?) (I want some.)
22. obscure holiday for "women" (Why put women in quotes? Couldn't it just be 'obscure holiday for women'? Googler must have been a "man.")
23. sushi touched my soul (What.)
24. uzbekistan got skipped (I hate when that happens.)
25. ways to explain parking in a snow emergency (I'll explain it now: Everyone parks like an idiot. You can too! Yay!)

So. Darn. Funny. Thanks, Googlers!

I Don't Even Know What 'Hyponatremia' Is, but I Do Not Want It

Part of being a well-prepared marathoner is the physical training. Up the hill. Down the hill. 8 miles. 10 miles. A half marathon. 16 miles. Wind. Rain. Beating sun. You gotta get used to all of that.  Plus, learn to love blisters. 

The other part of being a well-prepared marathoner is to know as much as possible about race day.  What time do I need to be at the start? Where can I park? How many racers are there? When can I expect to see a water stop? How many satellite bathrooms are available and where? And most importantly (I think): what do I do if I get into trouble?

It is no secret that running a marathon is a bit stressful on one's body and the need for some medical attention on race day is common.  In order to prepare myself, today I read Twin Cities in Motion's medical procedures for the marathon. 

I found most of the information to be super helpful.  For one, I love a good color-coded system that tells me how the weather conditions may affect runners.  Also, it is good to know that there are over 300 medical staff and they are wearing orange.  This is important.

But some of the information, I found a little more amusing. Or maybe ironic? I am not sure.  Below, in the bolded text  you can read the policy and in the red italicized text you can read my thoughts on that policy.


"Runners who are ill should not start."
You cannot convince me that there is a single person who signed up for a marathon that is even close to being in their right mind.  All these runners are 'ill.'

This next part is in reference to their Impaired Runner Policy.

To be allowed to continue the race, a runner must:

a) be able to proceed in a straight path toward the finish line;
This would be easier to do if the race was a straight path towards the finish instead of weaving all over the Cities to add up to an obscene number of miles. I know the distance between Minneapolis and Saint Paul is not 26.2 miles...
b) be able to explain who they are, where they are on the course, and what they are doing;
In the best of health and clarity of mind, I would probably be able to tell you who I am.  But in the middle of a marathon there is no way I am going to know why I am on that course or what I am doing. I am going to think I have lost my mind a long time before any medical professional suspects it. I might already be thinking I have lost my mind.
c) look clinically fit to proceed with good skin color and body appearance
d) be able to maintain a reasonable running posture.
Both (c) and (d) assume you started the race with these things... which just might not be totally true for all of us.

Downed runner procedures:

When a runner goes down during or immediately after the race, the medical team will assess for cardiac arrest, exertional heat stroke, hyponatremia, insulin shock, and exercise associated collapse; begin first aid; and transfer.
Please also assess me for the common medical ailment "Worn the eff out."

The medical response plan includes advanced life support ambulances and bike teams with automatic defibrillators.
'Advanced life support?!' Dear god.

All runners are encouraged to provide family and friends with their race number in case of a medical emergency.

When my race number is assigned, you will likely be able to find it here, in some sort of email with paragraphs upon paragraphs of emergency information, as well as posted to social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter.  I just want to have all my bases covered.  In case something happens. Which it won't.

Honestly, I am not too worried-- I feel healthy, I know my limits and if I get overwhelmed during the race there is no harm in leaving the course. A finisher's medal is not worth losing my health or knee joints.  And it's comforting to know all this effort is going in to making sure every racer that day has the healthiest marathon possible.

A Reflection on 72 Hours of Wilderness

I have been attempting to compose, organize, and draft my thoughts on my recent trip to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness (BWCA) for several days now, but it is much harder than I thought.  Perhaps, much like the photos I captured while there, my storytelling can't really do that part of the world the justice it deserves. 

I thought about giving you the play by play-- detailing each lake, each portage, each mosquito-infested campsite, and relaying the horrors that are northwoods latrines. 

But it still didn't seem big enough.

So what I came up with is quite a bit simpler, a little more abstract.

To be in a wilderness so dense and unspoilt is an incredibly humbling experience. The moment the paddle shatters the reflected forest on the surface of the cool, clean lake I had to involuntarily surrender control to my environment. The weather, downed trees, nosy wildlife; they all have the ability to overpower the skills I bring with me.  There is only a small smattering of people, scattered few and far between, and travelers can't count on seeing anyone.  You certainly can't count on anyone having a working communication device. 

Those things in mind, I think it is a space that redefines 'trouble.'  To be in trouble here at home (flat tire, late bus, broken appliance, and so on) is really to be inconvenienced.  To be in trouble in the BWCA is to be in trouble.

To be in the BWCA is also empowering.  There is that beautiful feeling of chasing (and then catching!) an experience many people don't get to have.  It is a place ripe for accomplishing many things, from the simple breakfast cooked over a camp stove to the 232 rod portage.  It fosters a great sense of independence and self-reliance.  At the same time, it makes one put a lot of trust in the person they travel with-- trust that that person will have your best interests and safety in mind, trust that that person will communicate, trust that that person will not get (too) frustrated. 

I think I may have said this about rural North Dakota too, but if there is such thing as 'God's Country,' the BWCA is it.  I cannot think of many places that I have been to that inspired me with a sunrise, amazed me  and challenged throughout the day, instilled great fear and respect for my surroundings in me as the sunset washed the world in a purple shadow, and then gently rocked me to sleep with the most stars I have ever seen in one night and the gentle lullabye of wilderness in the nighttime. 

My words, like photos that just look like water, trees, and sky, do not begin to really describe this magnificent place.